Middle School Stuff #10: Stress

Tricky Middle School Stuff #10 - Stress (with the cover of the book Middle School - Safety Goggles Advised)

This series of articles explores what students told me about the trickier parts of middle school. Here’s the final post in this series –  #10 Stress.  If you missed earlier posts, here are links: #1 – Judgment, #2 – Friendship Changes, #3 – Popularity#4 – Crushes & Dating, # 5 – Cliques & Groups, #6 – Gossip, #7 – Social Media,  #8 – Mean and Bullying Behaviors and #9 – Peer Pressure.

While researching Middle School – Safety Goggles Advised, I visited 7th-grade classrooms and talked with students about school social dynamics. When I asked preteens to share the trickier parts of middle school, “stress” came up frequently. This makes sense, given that anxiety has been on the rise in adolescents for well over a decade.

Here are some comments middle school students shared about stress:

  • “It’s tough if you miss a day of school. There’s lots of work to make up.”
  • “After-school activities add to my stress. I feel really time-crunched. Social stuff is stressful, too.”
  • “Grades matter now. I’m constantly worried about missing assignments and am always checking my grades online.”
stressed black girl covering ears
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The Definition of Stress

Stress is defined as, “a state of mental or emotional strain resulting from difficult or demanding circumstances.” Sometimes, stress can be helpful and inspire us to tackle challenges. But it can also feel overwhelming at times, especially for kids and teens. 

Students shared that schoolwork, social dynamics, activities, and family life increased their stress levels. School shootings, global unrest, and conflict are also stressful for many adolescents. Caregivers can help kids navigate feelings of overwhelm by guiding them to put healthy practices in place to manage stress and anxiety.

Healthy Ways to Help Kids and Teens Reduce Stress

  • Taking deep breaths
  • Exercising
  • Getting enough sleep
  • Talking to a friend or trusted adult
  • Taking breaks to do something enjoyable
  • Learning to feel good about doing a “good job” instead of trying to do things perfectly
  • Breaking large tasks into smaller, manageable steps

Helping preteens and teens learn to manage stress is important for their well-being and emotional development. Here are some additional strategies caregivers can use to support kids navigating stress.

woman in blue shirt talking to a young man in white shirt
Photo by Kindel Media on Pexels.com

Ways Caregivers Can Support Middle School Kids Feeling Stressed

  1. Acknowledge and Validate Their Feelings:
    Emphasize that it’s okay to feel stressed and that everyone experiences stress differently. Listen attentively to their concerns and validate their emotions without judgment.
  2. Identify Stressors:
    Collaborate with them to identify the specific sources of stress in their lives. This could include schoolwork, social pressures, family dynamics, or extracurricular activities. 
  3. Promote Open Communication:
    Maintain open lines of communication and create a safe space for them to share their thoughts and feelings.
  4. Set Realistic Expectations:
    Help them set realistic expectations for themselves and avoid overloading their schedules. Guide them to prioritize tasks and manage their time effectively.
  5. Seek Professional Help if Needed:
    If stress becomes persistent or overwhelming, consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in child and adolescent mental health.

Stress is a normal part of life, but middle school students may be particularly vulnerable to stress due to the many changes they are experiencing. With support, adolescents learn to manage it effectively and develop healthy coping mechanisms that benefit them throughout their lives.

About Jessica Speer:

Jessica Speer is the author of books for kids and teens, including The Phone Book – Stay Safe, Be Smart, and Make the World Better with the Powerful Device in Your Hand. She is also the author of the award-winning, BFF or NRF (Not Really Friends)? A Girls Guide to Happy Friendships and Middle School – Safety Goggles Advised, both of which grew out of her work with kids. Blending social science, stories, and fun activities, her writing unpacks tricky stuff that surfaces during childhood and adolescence. She has a Master’s Degree in Social Sciences and a knack for writing about complex topics in ways that connect with kids. Jessica regularly contributes to media outlets on content related to kids, parenting, friendship, and social-emotional learning.

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